Being a Mom lets me be a little kid...

So I've decided that being a Mom has allowed my inner child to surface...hahaha I know most of you are thinking I've always been a goof but now I have an excuse...I get to wander through the Disney store and people don't think it's for me hahahha and I get to have a ball pit in my basement and push Isabella around on her little car and then watch her laugh as I tried to fit on it to ride myself...she really has brought me so much happiness...we were playing the other day I decided the moment needed to be captured so I found a box and set up the camera and put it on continuous shooting and got some cute shots...they definitely aren't "perfect" pictures but if you look closely at her smile it doesn't get much more perfect than that!!

It's funny I think that as much as this blog is for Isabella...for her to have a keepsake. I have a friend that says as the Mom you are the "memory keeper" and I want Isabella to have these when she is older...I think it's also good for me...I seem to blog about happy things when I'm stressed about others...it's like my way of reminding myself that everything is really ok!  Tonight Isabella didn't want to sleep and I can't help but find myself getting frustrated it isn't always wasy being here by myself....but it's more than worth it and now my sweet little angel is sleeping soundly in her bed and in the long run it's worth the work...

The Nutcracker

Over the weekend a sweet little girl that is very dear to my heart was in her first performance of the Nutcracker...Lets just start by saying that Olivia did a wonderful job she really shines!!  I was debating on if I should take Isabella or not...on one hand she loves music and lights and I really thought she would enjoy it....bbbbuuuttt on the other hand she is 1 (wow still not used to that) and doesn't exactly have the longest attention span....so after some deliberation I decided to take her and hope everything worked out....I know that Moms like to brag on their kids but Isabella was the best baby ever at the performance...once the house lights were dimmed and the show started my sweet little baby was glued to the stage....she was entranced by the show...I really think I might have a little dancer or maybe musician on my hands...if you can't tell I'm rooting for dancer...after intermission she was dancing and clapping on my lap and I couldn't help but see a little sparkle in her eyes when the audience applauded...I was so proud of her we even snapped a couple pictures of her watching the show!  Maybe one day I will be posting pictures of her first dance performance....not gonna lie I just got tears in my eyes....hahahahahah

Dear Isabella

Dear Isabella,
I can't believe you are one....I remember this time last year I was holding you in the hospital feeling very unsure of what to do...should I hold you or let you sleep in your bassinet...I remember the what if's in my head...what if I don't hear you cry....what if I can't make you feel better...what if I'm not good at this....what if what if...I remember thinking you were beautiful and that I could not believe that you were here...I remember it being so quiet in the room and I was just listening to you breath and it took my breath away...You still take my breath away today...You are sleeping now and just like a year ago today I'm amazed by you...amazed that in 12 short months you have learned to roll over, sit up, stand, walk, talk, climb, run and so much more...you have changed how I look at things...I have so many hopes and dreams for you, but mostly I hope that you know I'm always here and that I'm proud of you!  I hope that you always smile like you do now, with your whole face, you really are so happy...This past year has been amazing, there is no better feeling in the world than one of your hugs....I can't help but smile when I look at you...I can already see your determination yesterday you couldn't figure out how to get up onto your chair I watched you try and try again...you took a step back looked at it and figured it out...I hope you always take on things like that...just take a step back and try again!  You have taught me so much, you have taught me that there is something bigger than me out there, that I cannot control everything, you have taught me to never give up on what I want, that sometimes a bath can fix everything, the best pictures aren't always the "perfect" ones, what true love feels like...and I'm sure there is so much more I'm forgetting right now...Looking at you sleep right now I just can't get over what a little angel you are...I love you more than I can ever tell you...I hope you are having sweet dreams my little princess happy 1st birthday!!
Love
Your Momma

Look how you have changed beautiful girl!!

Birthday Extravaganza!!

So we all survived and pulled of the 1st birthday of the year...thankfully I only have to do this once a year I don't think I can take it more than that!  The party was at 11 we got there at 9 to make sure that everything was set up and ready...after a few exploding balloons and some missing plates everything was done, even the bounce house was blown up and ready to go...about that time I realized that my sweet little princess had very heavy eyes and then at 10:45 she fell asleep...at first I was devastated and then realized this could be a good thing so people got to snuggle the princess while she slept and everyone got to eat!  When she woke up she was in a great mood and everyone was ready for desert so we brought out the cake...we had a wardrobe change (yes I said wardrobe change) and got her in her chair...at first she wasn't sure what to do with her cake but soon figured it out and was covered in icing it was adorable...I can't believe what a personality she has...she really loved being the center of attention (Imagine that...hahahahha) She really wanted nothing to do with the opening presents process but she is the luckiest baby she got so many great presents!  Sean takes the cake with the fav present he got her a "baby grand piano" (if you know Sean you know that is soooo him) she plays it and dances behind it...then she will stop and pose with one hand on her head and stick her belly out...I haven't been able to capture this yet because it makes me laugh too hard =)  She is hilarious!  I think I may have a little performer on my hands!!!!  After the party was over everyone helped out and we had everything cleaned up and ready to go....Thank you everyone for all of your help!  It means so much to me to have such wonderful friends!  Here are just a few pics from the party it was so hard to pick because they are all so cute....

Tree lighting!!

In my Moms true Holiday Cheermiester form she wanted to take the girls to see the tree lighting and Santa arrival...so I put on a red shirt and some Christmas light earrings and off we went hahahah it was soooo cold I ended up buying a new hat and gloves, but we had a good time...Santa arrived by helicopter which made me super nervous considering it was a blustery day (that word cracks me up...blustery....hahaha) So as Santa's helicopter is landing I was looking for cover in case of a crash...not gonna lie...I was concerned at one point...but anyway...the jolly old man landed safely...I mean I should have known he could do it, he's Santa for goodness sakes...but after waving to crowd he went over to light the tree at Legends...the girls seemed to really enjoy the chaos...Isabella was just watching everyone...thats really all she could do because she was bundled up to tight to do anything else...once the lights were lit B and Iz (or "the BIz" as we refer to them...haha they are going to hate us) were pumped...they both loved the music and lights!  Can't wait to take her to see Santa...I'm a little disappointed in myself blogging about Christmas on the eve of my favorite Holiday but it was a lot of fun!!

This is why I get nothing done....

So I have figured out why I seem to not get anything done...haha it's because it is way more fun to spin Isabella in the laundry basket instead of folding clothes...haha She has started climbing so when she found herself stuck inside the laundry basket I couldn't resist the urge to spin her...so I started slowly at first (I didn't want to totally freak her out and ruin amusement park rides forever) and she smiled a little....so I started spinning her and she was laughing so loud...you know that good belly baby laugh it was cracking me up...so of course I had to grab my camera to capture this hilarious moment...so here is what happens when mom doesn't want to fold clothes...I wish you could hear her sweet giggle!!

Love...

Sometimes this sweet little baby just gets me and tonight is one of those nights...I was rocking Isabella to sleep and she fell asleep holding my hand...and I just started to cry...I know there will come a day when she will be to cool to hold my hand, or when she won't "need" me anymore...there are so many things I want for her...as I was sitting there holding her hand I can't help but think of those things...I want her to always reach for the stars...I want her to be proud of who she is and have the strength to go after what she wants...I want her to always know she is loved and know that she can do anything she puts her mind to....I wish I could protect her from the hurt but I know I can't so I want her to know I'm always there and nothing can change that...I hope she always knows how much she means to me, that she has changed me, and that all the decisions I have made so far and all that I make in the future I am doing what I thought was best for her...I hope she knows that when I was a little girl I wanted to be special that I have always been fighting and searching for something I could never put my finger on...maybe have my name it lights or be the first woman president (even though now I wouldn't even vote for one)...little did I know that nothing in the world could feel as good as this sweet little girl holding my hand when she fell asleep...so for now I'm going to enjoy the moments when I just get to hold her!

Mini Holiday Cheer Meister

So I'm not sure if it's because of her birth month or if my Mom has just rubbed off on her...but Isabella is a mini Holiday Cheer Meister....my mother holds the title currently but with her love of Christmas decorations Isabella may be giving her a run for her money! My mom always puts her tree up the first weekend after Halloween...much to my Thanksgiving loving self but hey it's her thing...well Isabella loves the lights!  She was so excited when we were putting up my moms tree that I went and got her a small one for her room!  My mom and B came over to help!  Isabella was running around with her new ornaments slamming them together...well lets just say I totally forgot that ornaments were normally made of glass until I heard the sound of breaking glass....my sweet little baby is standing with 2 broken ornaments in her hands looking very confused...thankfully no one got hurt but I definitely learned my lesson!  Her tree looks great I think she will be sad when we have to take it down...

"moe" and "Th-at"

So my sweet little overachiever is starting to say a few things....her top 2 though are "moe" and "th-at" (with 2 syllables) it's hilarious well the first 100 times a day it is...if she sees anything that she wants or even just thinks she might want immediately her little finger is pointing and she is saying th-at th-at...and then the game begins of picking up all of the items in the general vicinity of the point to figure out what she wants...she is becoming such a little person....she is always "talking" I'm not quite sure what she is saying but it sounds like she does...It blows me away that in a few weeks she is going to be ONE and I just can't believe how much has changed in this year...she blows me away everyday...who knows what will come out of her mouth next...but for now I'm sure there will be tons more of "moe" and "th-at"

I know this is short but this is much "moe" to be done around here =)

Cutest little elephant

So I have decided that Isabella's first Halloween was more for me than her...haha she was an elephant and it was seriously the cutest costume ever....(I know I'm probably a little bias) She was such a trooper she just walked around wearing her ridiculous costume flopping her giant ears...hahaha it was awesome....she even had a couple bites of some candy....I know I know I'm such a terrible Mom hahhaha I was so proud of her though...it blows me away how big she is...she is walking and jabbering and it breaks my heart a little that she doesn't really even look like a baby anymore...at least she is getting more fun...I love watching more and more of her personality emerge every day...I have a feeling I'm in for it!  So here are a few pictures of the elephant!!

Trip to KSU!!

So my sister and I thought it would be great to take our girls to a KSU game!  It sounded genius getting to spend the whole day with them...teaching them to get ready to yell when the announcer says "that's good for a wildcat....FIRST DOWN", the Wabash, and of course my favorite park KKKKKK SSSSSSS UUUUUUU wildcats!!  We however did not think through the logistics of the whole thing but whatev it was an experience....The girls slept most of the way to the game....even though we got lost and it ended up taking us 3 hours instead of 1.5 and yes I said lost I know it's a straight shot but it's to difficult to explain!  Then once we finally arrived it rained through out the majority of the game, however the girls still loved it!  Thankfully we had a little break with Tyler at his family's tailgate....the girls got to eat and play a little so that was helpful!  We even ran into Willie when we got there....it didn't work out as magical in person as it did in my head...I had imagined Willie holding both the girls with them smiling and us getting a great picture....what really happened was Isabella clinging to me and B screaming "NNNOOOOO I WANT TO GO HOME" I guess I didn't realize he might be a little scary...ooppps...we still have a pic hopefully we will get a better one later!  Then on the way home we (by we I mean me while driving my sisters car) backed into a car....all is well though we survived and the girls have officially been to a game....it may be their last for a while but I'm so glad we did it!!!

PUMPKIN PATCH!!!

So this weekend we took the kids to the pumpkin patch!  My mom got these adoooorrraaablllee TuTus for the girls to wear (I hope you could hear the sarcasm)....when we got there the kids were immediately entranced by this little pony...hahaha I think they thought it was a miniature Tank....there was a playground and a corn maze...Boston was cracking me up she just wanted to run...I swear somehow my sister and I have switched children hahahahha Isabella had a good time crawling and walking through the tunnels...she is really loving being able to get down and play instead of being stuck in a stroller or being held...she gets filthy most of the time but hey she is having fun!  We rode a hay ride out to the pumpkin patch and searched for the perfect one...Isabella's technique for the search is to stand by the pumpkin and pound on it....hahaha hilarious she would just go from pumpkin to pumpkin slapping them!  Boston spent her time trying to escape by running as fast and as far as she could hahhahaa, and of course as we are leaving Isabella passes out...she always does...oh to be a baby and just be able to sleep whenever I could!!

Sharing....

I can't get over the fact that Isabella is 10mo old now..,her personality is showing up more and more it makes me a little nervous just because I can see myself (and not only good qualities haha)....she wants to do everything herself, to include going down the stairs(which means falling), taking off her shoes(which means lost shoes), eating by herself(making a giant mess), and taking her bows out (which drives me crazy)...I wouldn't have her any other way though!! We had everyone over for my Dads birthday and Isabella wanted to eat an apple...she doesn't eat an apple like most babies would....she wants to hold it and chew on it (with her 2 whole teeth haha)...it cracks me up...she is willing to share though...this little girl brightens my day!!

Someone remind me of this when she won't share later!! HAHAHA

Teething....UUGGHHH

So I know that I've been lucky having a baby that has a pretty mellow temperament, who knows how someone that came from me has a mellow temperament....but she does...unless she doesn't feel good...her first 2 teeth she got came in relatively easy and didn't faze her to much however these top two are rough...she has been running a fever and not sleeping well and having awful drainage...however just like when I don't feel good a bath can make everything better...so I had to capture these adorable little smiles to remember my sweet little baby is still in there and will return as soon as the teething monster leaves her alone!  HAHA

So I can't believe it but Isabella is walking...she is only 9.5mo old and she took 5 steps yesterday and 6 today!  It just blows me away!  Everytime she takes her sweet little steps I am stunned and then the eyes get blurry...she is getting so big!  I'm really proud of her too...you can really see how happy she is when she gets going...she is struggling with trying to go to fast...cracks me up because I was always in trouble for that when I was little...I rememeber my 4th grade teacher in particular getting onto me about it...haha poor baby hopefully I'm not turning her into a little I must be an overachiever monster like me...hahahaha who knows a little bit of drive never hurt anyone!!  I know I've said this a million times but I really had no idea you could love someone so much...she takes my breath away!  I can't wait to see what she does next....walking today....who knows tomorrow!!!

The things you do for your kids....

So for those of you that don't know I'm terrified of clowns....not just creeped out...terrified...fight or flight kicks in and I normally embarrass myself...but now I have a baby and the circus was in town...Sammie wanted to take Boston and so I decided to brave the circus for Isabella...I was sick to my stomach as we walked up just kept trying to think that my fear is irrational and that I can handle this! HAHA even typing this it sounds ridiculous but I can't help it they scare me!  Anyway...I survived it actually wasn't even that bad...the show was great and Isabella seemed to enjoy it...well except for the nap she took during the show...haha she's still a baby, give her a break!  Thankfully the only clowns we saw were down in the ring and it only made my heart race just a little (I'm growing up so much haha)....Aunt Sammie fed Isabella a snow cone (which she loved) Aunt Sammie is notorious for feeding her things that she probably shouldn't have...but whatev! It was such a good time...

Can't believe she is 9 months old!!

So it kind of blows me away that Isabella is 9 months old...I can't believe it...she amazes everyday!  She is standing all by herself and running not walking but running with her push toys...she is developing such a personality too...she will slam her hand down if she thinks you aren't paying attention to her or give you kisses if you look upset...I can't get over how much she has changed me and how I look at things...any day now she is going to be walking, it's all happened so fast!  She says Mamamamamamamama which melts my heart every time and a few other words too!  It's only been 9 months but I don't remember what I did with myself without her.  I am so happy that she has Boston too, they both light up when they see each other and B is her personal protector and watch out if you mess with "my Iz" as B would say! We have had some rough nights with this new personality too...I think I may have met my match on stubbornness and after a few nights of tears she is going to bed like a champ...I'm not saying it was easy one night even had to take a walk around the block while Genna and Sammie listened to see if she was sleeping yet...Yesterday we went to her 9 month doctors appointment she is doing awesome she is exceeding all of her developmental goals and instead of screaming her little head off when she got her shots...she just gave the nurse a look that said "I don't suggest you do that again" HAHA I have know idea where she got that =)....our latest battle has been about eating....Isabella has decided that she is big enough to feed herself and does not like me feeding her...well the only problem with that is that the whole spoon thing wasn't working out for her...the floor was eating more than she was....so first I tricked her with giving her a spoon to hold herself that worked for a one whole meal...so she loves to play with the packages her food comes in...so I decided to just open it and give it to her and see what happened....so I put the end in her mouth and squeezed it just a bit so she realized she could get the food out herself....and.....VOILA everyone is happy...Isabella is happy because she is doing it herself and Momma is happy because she is actually eating!!!!!  These 9 months have been so much fun I can't wait to see what happens next!!

 

Isabella may never be a cheerleader....=*(

So if any of you have children you know that sometimes getting ready is an impossible task with a little person climbing all over your legs....so I'm always trying to find ways to entertain Isabella....safely, without her falling down the stairs or pulling my 15lb makeup case off the counter...that was actually funny because I just caught the case and the make up just rained down on her....she just stared at me like "WHAT JUST HAPPENED?" (and the 15lbs in not an exaggeration I actually took it out of my suitcase at the airport one time haha) so I found one of my old Pom Poms and gave her that...at first she just looked at it and then when she heard the noise when she shook it she was hooked...she was laughing and screaming while shaking it...it was cracking me up...I was pumped that I had found something to help move along the getting ready process until we were getting ready to leave and I looked at her beautiful little face....she was covered in red splotches...at first I was a little nervous but the splotches didn't seem to be spreading or swelling so I just watched her and eventually they went away...so now the joke is that she will be the bright red cheerleader hahahahahah poor baby!!

B TURNED 2!!!!!

Boston's Birthday Party was over the weekend!! We had such a great time!!  Isabella crawled around on the floor and pulled on B's TuTu it was adorable and disgusting when I picked her up and saw her black knees...YUCK!!  Isabella also had lots of food firsts (behind my back) but we all had a great time!  I have more pictures from the party but they are on Tylers (Sams boyfriend) camera...I will post them soon!!

Genna and I made some amazing cake balls for the party! She was nice enough to lay it out for everyone...so I can't take credit for the imaging, Genna put it together, but this is what we did!!!

What is it about a baby's laugh???

I love love love my half days because I get to spend the afternoon playing with Isabella!  She is at the best age...well I guess so far the best age....she gets excited when she sees me and she is actually responding to me!  So many of our Tuesday afternoons are spent sitting on the living room floor playing, he new favorite is the amazing game "lets unpack the toy box" haha I will have to thank Zander (Genna's little guy) for teaching her that wonderful trick!  Sooooo since it's Tuesday afternoon I thought I'd share this adorable giggle with you!

Disclaimer....FOR PARENTS ONLY

SOOOOO I have a bone to pick with all of you that were moms before me!!  NO ONE I repeat NO ONE told me about some of the crazy things that happen when you have a baby! Yesterday my adorable little princess made a mess of herself trying to eat herself (thats a whole different subject)!  So we head for the bath, she loves the water and now that I've let her out of her baby bath cage she thinks being in the bath is soooo much fun...anyway she is playing and all of the sudden just stops and looks very serious....I'm laughing at her serious face and then I realize what I think is happening....but it's to late the water is turning a litttle tan....AAAHHHHH there is POOP in the bath...I immediately grab her out of the water and sit her on the bath rug and stand there dumbfounded....what do I do with this....and just let me tell you this is not a normal baby poop.....I swear it was the size of a grown mans....I know that's disgusting but I feel like if I don't give you the whole picture you just won't understand....all I can say is what do I do with this....this is horrible....what do I do with this....then Isabella starts crying because she is sitting on the floor soaking wet....poor baby at least I know how to solve this one!  I get her dried off and dressed...UGGHHH back to the mess I wish there was a mess fairy that came by and fixed this...so I had to drain the tub....bleach all the toys and of course the tub...I did that one twice haha...it was rough but I guess it'll make for a good laugh now! 

She is getting so big now I just can't get over her little personality....I don't know who has more fun playing me or her?

She is over me feeding her...too bad she has decided that she can do it herself...which makes a huge mess and very little food into her mouth....this too shall pass...I hope so at least! 

Oh one more mediocre thought.............................................................................................................

July Update!!

Ok so I know I said I'd be better at this....but I wasn't...however with my new blog make over (THANKS GENNA) I'm very excited to blog! So without further ado here is the update for July with more to come!!!

July was busy month...not only is my birthday in July my brothers and sisters is as well...so July makes for a crazy month! I was so excited to share my favorite holiday with my sweet little princess....if you aren't catching on it's 4th of July...something about the smell of fireworks in the air it just gets me....every year we have a get together at my parents house and everyone brings food and drinks and has a great time...this year Isabella and I made a red velvet fruit cake it looked beautiful at home then slid into a gooey mess on the way to the party...hahaha whatev it still tasted fabulous!! Isabella had so many "first 4th" outfits that she had many wardrobe changes...a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do...hahaha So the day before we went out firework shopping and I started to get a little nervous about Isabella liking it as much as me...I was realyy hoping that I didn't end up sitting inside with her and Tank (my 200lb fraidy cat) he's a mess....thankfully this was not the case!! We started the morning off with swimming...Of course Isabella had to rock her patriotic bikini...hahaha I wish I could be a baby then it would be cute to have a pop belly and rolls on my thighs....it's just too stinkin cute!! =) She did great with the fireworks she had fun watching B and me set off smoke bombs and sparklers (I can't get over how big my niece is getting)....she even tried out a sparkler for herself (well kind of)...She has always liked lights so once the night time festivities started she just sat with me in awe of the pretty lights! We had such a good time!!

A couple weeks later we went to Michigan to visit some great friends...Genna was finally coming home from Korea which meant she finally got to meet the princess and could meet her new little guy! Isabella was a rock star traveler....we got stranded on the runway on the way there for 2 hours and she just played and talked to people around us...then slept then entire flight...Everyone kept telling her she was the best baby they have ever met...I'd have to agree but I'm probably a little bias hahaha! We went to the zoo, the play ground, and the botanical gardens it was so nice to see Genna and the boys!!

She pulled herself up....and got her first black eye!

I can't believe it my sweet little princess has her first shiner....something tells me this won't be the last! She was in her bath splashing and playing with Boston (my niece) and I was sitting by the tub thinking how lucky they are to have each other...and out of no where Isabella grabs the side of her bath tub and pulls herself up...I couldn't believe it and I think the shock of it all slowed my reaction time a little and a bath tub isn't exactly the best place for unsure little feet and they slipped right out from under her and she hit her sweet little face on the side of the tub...so sad! I hate the "hurt" cry it just rips your heart out...and of course I had to get the camera to commemorate the moment hahahah this is her right after she calmed down...not to bad the purple didn't show up until the later...

The sweet thing about little ones is, once she calmed down she was over it and back to playing! It was hilarious...she has pulled herself up once more in her crib since then, so I think it's time to lower her mattress...she is such a little rock star trying to stand before she's 7mo old...she is super strong! I feel like this means that my peace of mind is out the window though...I can no longer put her down to play and know that she will in that same place when I turn my back....haha this morning I turned my back for 2 seconds to make a phone call and I turned around and found her inside the bottom shelf of the table it he living room...I think I might need to reconsider it's placement...I guess it's full speed ahead now...I need to find something to cover the fireplace because I can handle first black eye...first stitches however I am not ready for!


Pay no attention to the empty frame next to the table...haha I really need to get that done!! It's just hard to do when there are other things to do that are so much more fun like playing with bubbles! Isabella loves these bubbles Dr Martin got her that don't pop immediately she crawls all over her room to get them!! =)

TOOOO LONG

Ok so it's been about a million years since I've posted but hey I'm doing it now right...ha ha well anyway Isabella is a growing machine! Her newest trick is her infamous push up...she cracks me up! Now shes getting into the front leaning rest position (push up or plank) and walking her feet into her hands and then sitting there like "what in the heck do I do now" it's very entertaining...it has also turned me into a crazy person trying to make sure that the house is now baby proof for a baby that actually moves...it's a little different!

I cannot believe how much personality she already has...it's amazing how much she is coming into her own little person...for example she is insistent on sleeping on her tummy...for the first couple of nights I would go into her room and flip her back over and by the time I got back to my room and checked the monitor she was already back on her tummy....I lost a lot of sleep over that, ha ha what a nerd! I've always been a worrier but this new mom thing is a little over the top, so after a few days of the flipping her back over war I've surrendered...and now I just giggle as I lay her down in her crib and she immediately flips onto her tummy....

She also loves music...it really does soothe her, my good friend Sean made her a classical CD that she will coo and play too...and of course we spend many of evenings dancing to music on TV ha ha she is so much fun and hopefully I have a little dancer on my hands! =) One of my favorite new things she is doing is reaching for me....it is the best feeling in the world to walk into a room and see her beautiful little face light up and get excited...there is nothing better! It melts my heart every time....someone remind me of this when we hit the whining reaching stage ha ha She is such a happy baby makes me nervous that if I ever had another one it would be rough ha ha

She has taken a few "steps" forward in her push up position...I'm sure any time now she will be full speed ahead!

I'm getting her 6mo pictures taken today so I will post again soon (really I will)!

Has it been a month?

It's a month since I've blogged wow time is flying by! I'm sitting here watching Isabella play with her new doll...it's crazy to me that she is already so big...she is cooing now all the time and it's the sweetest sound I've ever heard! Last week she tricked me and slept through the night all week and now shes back to waking up once...I know I shouldn't complain about waking up only once but that taste of sleeping through the night again was nice!

She is getting her own little personality now...her newest trick is to arch her back when she doesn't want to get in her car seat....OH NO the attitude begins hahaha I had the week off this week and it was so nice to spend time with her...makes me a little bummed about going back to work next week. I'm so thankful that I have such a happy baby....

One thing I've been struggling with this week is getting defensive. I don't know if this is normal or not...but when I'm at home and Isabella gets fussy or cries it doesn't bother me at all, she has the sweetest little cry so at home I find myself laughing at how cute her cry is....however when I'm out somewhere even just at my parents house I feel myself getting very anxious whenever she cries or gets fussy. It's bizarre she's 3mo old of course she's not going to be perfect all the time (even though I'm pretty lucky with how good she is) It's just the strangest feeling it's like when she starts to cry I feel like everyone is judging my Mommy skills...I know that's probably crazy but I can't help but feel that way...I know that it's doesn't help her being upset either...she can totally sense that I'm starting to panic and then she just gets more upset....hopefully I can calm my anxiety because it's not a fun feeling!!

The picture in this post was taken with my friends camera...and now I've decided my simple point and shoot isn't doing my adorable little baby justice so now I'm on a mission for a new camera...any recommendations?

Morning Smiles

I can't believe it's been so long since I've blogged...but being back at work has been a little more trying than I originally thought....I miss her so much while I'm at work and am super nervous about missing things...however I'm extremely thankful that I am leaving her with my sister...that makes it easier! The first day back at work when a post partum pt brought her new baby girl in I cried but now that's it's been a few weeks I'm getting used to it...it makes holding Isabella when I get some even sweeter than usual...
This week has been interesting...got a speeding ticket Tuesday morning (seriously I think that cops have better things to do than harass me on my way to work but whatev) Then Wed Mac's Nonna passed away...I hated hearing the pain in his voice when he called to tell me. She was a wonderful woman who had a long wonderful life...she called me the night before she had her stroke and told me that she had been thinking of the baby and wanted to tell me that the best thing I can do for my new little family is prayer...I plan on keeping her advice in mind on stressful days to come...she will be truly missed...
Isabella has been projectile vomiting for a few days now...poor little lady it's been rough, we went to the doctor and they think it could be reflux so she is on new medicine and they wanted me to try and give her some formula to calm her tummy...she has been doing much better on the the formula...it makes me a little bummed that I might have to stop nursing but I'd much rather her be healthy of course...even with all the throwing up she has still been such a sweet baby...she has the most adorable smile...it makes me so happy! Here she is!!

I seem to get way better pictures on my phone than my camera...whenever she sees the camera she turns her smile off hahaha little booger!!

Look Mom my arm makes noise....

Last night I randomly picked up a cute rattle while standing in line to check out last night at Babies 'R Us...I've been trying to give Isabella toys and nothing really seemed interesting to her....after her bath last night she was laying on her little mat and I thought I'd try the new rattle...it was the cutest thing...She was just holding it and when she moved her arm....she froze and stared at her hand for a minute...then did it again...it was hilarious watching her figure it out....Once she realized she had control of the noise she was elated...she was so excited and making the most adorable little noises! I never could have known how much joy she would bring me!

I have a license to give medication....

So at first I swore everyone that I told about this to secrecy, but after talking to a few friends and realizing I'm not the only person that's done this...and now that all is well it's a good story.

Friday afternoon I took Isabella to the doctor because her cold wasn't getting better and she had a little rash on her face. The doctor told me that sometimes a rash is a sign of an ear infection (which I've never heard before) and decided to go ahead and give her an antibiotic. I go and get it filled and when I get home I realize the Walgreens didn't give me the little dropper for her medicine. So I look through the stuff I bought and found a little medicine cup with a nipple on it in my first aid kit. I looked at the side and see that it's graduated with mls one side and tsp on the other....She needs 2mls...so I get the medicine out and proceed to pour to the 2 on the cup...I thought to myself at this point "that looks like a lot" I check it again yep at the 2...I bring it over to Isabella and she is such a good baby takes the medicine without any trouble...right as she finishes it hits me....OMG I just gave her 2tsp instead of 2ml....I immediately convert that in my head and realize that 2tsp=10ml which would be 5x the amount she needed...I felt like all the blood drained out of my body and I froze...this lasted about 5sec then I immediately started calling people...I called my mom then the doctors office....I felt like I was on hold forever (I'm sure it wasn't that long) and while I was waiting I was googling side effects and found the poison control number. I was almost hysterical at this point...the doctor got on the phone and was so nice he told me that the worst thing that could happen was that she will vomit or have diarrhea but she will be totally fine. I think I asked him if he was sure 30 times and he continued to reassure me that it was ok...So after I talked to him just to be sure I called poison control, the man that answered was very calming as well and told me that she would be fine and not to worry....This whole time Isabella is just sitting in her bouncer watching me...When I got off of the phone and the adrenaline started to fade I just started to cry...I picked up Isabella and held her and cried I don't think I have ever been so scared in my life. I was mortified I could not believe that I had given her the wrong dose...I am such a perfectionist I felt like I had failed my beautiful little girl...while I was holding her crying she looked up at me and gave me a big adorable smile (this was the first time she had ever smiled that big) and I just started to laugh. It was like my little baby was saying "Mom why are you crying....I'm ok" I will never forget that smile....After talking to a few of my friends that have babies they all told me a story about a time when they had done something similar it started eased the failure feeling a little...I think I said "but I have a license to give people medication" a million times that day...so the lesson I learned from all of this is...now I'm the mommy not the nurse. I'm sure the mistake will never happen again and now it'll be a good story to tell her later!
It's been a few days now and she is doing great...the cold is almost gone too! She is doing wonderful and I am preparing to go back to work next week. I'm nervous and sad to leave her (thankfully she is staying with my sister who I trust with my life) but I think it will be nice to get back to work.

It's already been over a month...

I can't believe my little baby is already over a month old. She weighs 8lbs 9oz (2lbs since birth) now and is doing well. She has a little cold and it breaks my heart to listen to her little cough. I love being a mom more than I ever could have imagined. I just look at her beautiful little face and fall in love all over again. She is starting to interact a little more now, I can't wait until I get a real smile. I've seen a few little ones in her sleep but no real smiles yet. I'm headed back to work in a couple weeks and am pretty sure there will be some tears the first few mornings. It's already going by so fast...I could just sit and look at her all day...she is so sweet...I will try and remember this when she gets sassy haha. Here is an updated picture of her!